0 Rules for Dating my Daughter

10 Rules for Dating my Daughter 



Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering, because you're sure not picking anything up. 



Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter. You may glance at her while talking, so long as you do not peer below her neck. If you cannot keep your hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them from your arms. 



Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but I think you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: Should you come to the door with your underwear showing and/or your pants ten sizes too big, I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waistline. 



Rule Four:  You will not have sex with my daughter until after you marry her. My permission is required before you make any proposal to her. Any attempts to do so will result in your disappearance. No, I will not make this a public affair that would embarrass you. Your disappearance will say more than a public announcement. 



Rule Five: It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only words I need from you on this subject is:"Sir" and "early." 



Rule Six: I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you scream. 



Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating my daughter. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process than can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like cutting my lawns or changing the oil in my pickup trucks? 



Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are no crowds, beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or carefree happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka -- zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws or hangings are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better. 



Rule Nine: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am  all-knowing and merciless. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have only one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. In my shop and my home I have many chemicals, such as hot lime, many firearms, shovels, a backhoe, and five hundred acres behind the house. "Do not mess with my mind if you wish to see the next sunrise. Short truthful answers are best". 



Rule Ten: After dark, you will blow your horn once, only once, when leaving the highway. As soon as you pull in front of the house, you should exit the car with both hands in plain sight. Speak in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, remain standing next to your car. Do not escort my daughter to the front door hoping for a kiss on the cheek -- there is no need for you to come inside my home after the sun sets. After my daughter enters the house, restart your car and quietly leave my property. The speed limit is 10 mph entering or exiting the property. Do not stop to chat with the man holding the night sight equipped rifle, that will be me. 

The History of Dating

The History of Dating

2 Timothy 2:22

Dating has become one of the most dangerous activities a young person can be involved in. How was dating done throughout history? Is dating any different than it was centuries ago? Today, we take a look at the history of dating.

I. Dating in Colonial times

A. In colonial times, dating was referred to as courtship.

1. Courtship was was usually confined to the parlor of the female's family.

2. Most relationships and communities were built around the church, which encouraged
purity.

B. Love was something that developed after marriage, it was not romantic!

II. Dating between 1840's-1900's

A. Courtship became a formal activity, and chaperons were required.

B. Romantic love was beginning to be viewed as the primary reason for marriage.

C. Women began to test their potential mate by faking illness, or breaking off the
relationship to test the man's commitment.

D. Purity was still important!

III. Dating in the early 1900's

A. Courtship begins to evolve into dating.

1. Poorer families whose house was not large enough for a parlor, began to court in
public places.

2. The wealthy followed this trend, and "going somewhere" became the norm.

B. The popular dates were dancing and movies. (These activities required money, making
the boys with more money more likely to get a date.)

C. Chaperons were not considered necessary in public.

IV. Mid 1900's to Present

A. Dating is becoming the normal activity for young people.

1. Dating was considered a way to get to know someone.

2. Dating is becoming "casual" and not for marriage.

B. The widespread ownership of automobiles changed dating.

1. Automobiles helped young people escape the public scene.

2. Physical contact in dating becomes the popular thing

C. Purity slowly loses importance.

1. Physical contact is accepted as long as the couple was "pure."

2. Purity is no longer the norm, and is now very rare.

V. Conclusion:

A. Dating/ Courtship have changed drastically through the years!

B. Despite societies preferences, PURITY IS IMPORTANT! ( Col. 3:5, Eph. 5:3)

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Intro to Dating

Introduction to Dating

2 Timothy 2:22

Where are you spiritually?

Before we can deal with the topic of dating, we must stop and take a look at our lives. Any human relationship requires a Christian to analyze their life through the Word of God. God has standards for His people to live by, and it is imperative that we apply them in our lives in order to have any type of relationship.

1. The primary focus is your relationship with God!

A. Salvation and assurance of Salvation are required!- John 3:3, Matt. 7:21-23

B. Become a student of the Scriptures! Psalm 119:11, 2 Timothy 2:15

C. Separate from the World! 2 Corinthians 6:17, 2 Timothy 2:22

2. How are your other relationships?

A. Your relationship with your family matters!

1. Parents- Ephesians 6:1-2, Colossians 3:20, 2 Timothy 3:2

2. Siblings- Luke 15: 25-32, 1 John 4:20-21

B. Your relationship with friends matters!

1. Develop friendships- Proverbs 17:17,18:24, 27:6,9

2. Maintain proper friendships- James 4:4 (Example: 2 Samuel 13)